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Monday, July 5, 2010

#4-REVENGE OF THE PINK GRANNY PANTIES (REVISED)


Dear Secret Agent,

Chuck Masters isn't gunnin' for trouble, he just wants to have a little fun. Fun's not something his one-horse Oklahoma town is known for. It is known for basketball, and Chuck's the MVP of the eighth grade team. That is, until he and new kid, Foster F. Finkman, pull one prank too many and cause a substitute teacher to resign. Chuck's conscience kicks in, and he bucks Triple F's next stunt. Finkman disses Chuck's single mom--a declaration of all-out war. Chuck launches "The Revenge of the Pink Granny Panties" with a basket of oversized undies as his arsenal. But when the get-even scheme backfires, Chuck loses his spot on the basketball team, the respect of the coach he looks to as a father, and his friends. In order to get his life on track, Chuck's got to put away paybacks and become a real team player. REVENGE OF THE PINK GRANNY PANTIES is a middle-grade novel complete at 27,000 words.

My publishing credits include Highlights for Children, Chess Life for Kids, Characters, and Story Something. I've won several writing awards, most notably Highlights Author of the Month, Feb. 2010, and Highlights Fiction Contest Winner, 2009. I'm a member of SCBWI.

Thank you for your time and consideration.

Sincerely,

***

I walked into math class and scoped out the sub. Easy prey.

What little life Mr. Thompson had was about to get a whole lot worse.

Our math teacher had finally had her kid and was home changing diapers for a month. We were on our second sub of the week, and Foster F. Finkman made it his job to upset subs.

I was his partner in crime.

Mr. Thompson was the victim of a bad brown toupee. It looked like Grunt, my guinea pig. This teacher wannabe was somewhere between thirty and fifty, had braces and smelled like there was roadkill in his grill. I'd had him as a sub since kindergarten and he hadn't changed a bit. Except for the braces.

Toupee Thompson knew all of us at Harly Middle School by name. It isn't a big school, since Harly isn't a big town. Okies say you can stand at one end of it and spit to the other. So when he noticed Finkman was new, the sub flashed a silvery smile and squeaked, "What's your name,
young man?"

Finkman stood and squeaked back, "Foster Florentine Finkman, sir. And I hope you don't mind my asking, but has your hairpiece had its rabies shot?"

The class cracked up. Thompson turned pink and had this foamy spit at the corners of his mouth. "Finkman? What kind of stupid made up name is that? Is that the best you could do?"